Serve and Return is a type of interaction between adult and child that involves a back-and-forth engagement. An example of this is the much-loved game of peek-a-boo. The repetition of these back-and-forth actions form the foundation of pre literacy skills and a wonderful opportunity for co-regulation. These types of activities help build strong neural architecture critical for the first two years of life.
Key Elements of Serve and Return
If we think about peek-a-boo, you can see how the elements of surprise and anticipation lead to joy between parent and child. This is enhanced by the parents’ presence, engagement and mirroring of facial expressions. This is called attunement and helps children to feel deeply connected.
Using words to describe what you do and see is also key. Younger children will require less language so it might be as simple as eg up it goes, your turn or sounds of surprise and wonder “ooooh” “woah”
Some examples of serve and return activities are:
- Rolling a ball back and forth
- Throwing a toy in the air and mimicking surprise
- Placing a baby on a large exercise ball and doing ball rocking with facial engagement and noises. If both parents are present one parent can rock the baby while the other is in front to mimic surprise as they roll forward or high 5 if they are older. This also gets them using their extensor muscles and engaging in active tummy time.
- Having a baby in your lap and rocking back and forth
- Doing clapping games together
At the end of the day, it is less about the activity and more about the relational intent. Purposeful engagement with a parent is the cornerstone for resilience and emotional regulation. Serve and return activities mean that both child and parent are physically and emotionally engaged by the experience.
References:
Eberle, Scott G. The Elements of Play: Toward a Philosophy and a Definition of Play. American Journal of Play v6 n2 p214-233 Win 2014